Thought I'd support a worthy cause, enjoy a night out with my gal pals and play a little bingo. I'm usually pretty lucky at bingo so I thought I might win a few prizes!
The charity we were going to support was for death row dogs. I guess they save dogs who are on the docket for being put to sleep. The event was being held at Hamburger Mary's, some place in downtown Kansas City.
After last night, my husband says I can no longer accompany my friend, Lorrie, on any gal pal outings!!!
The evening started out with a bang; a crash bang! We were almost hit by a truck trying to escape from the police. Upon entering a highway ramp, the guy flew by us followed by 2 cop cars, sirens screaming. More cop cars coming from all directions. Lorrie slammed on her brakes and we wondered if we might want to change our route. After the coast cleared we tentatively made our way downtown.
It took a while to find the place, so we had to whip out the old GPS device. (Lorrie thought she knew where she was going----but I guess not!!!---in more ways than one!!)
Well we got to Hamburger Mary's just in time. Walked in----only to find ourselves in a GAY bar!!!! Oh it was a-swing-in!!! We were greeted by a lovely hostess. Patty turned to me and asked, "Just tell me, is that a girl or a guy?" Yes, the lovely transvestite asked us if we were here to play some BINGO!!! The place was hoppin---so we ended up in the back sitting at the bar. Ordered up our drinks---thought we might need a few before the night was over---payed our $10.00 for our ten bingo cards AND proceeded to play GAY BINGO!!!
Our hostess chose the type of bingo, proceeded to sing and dance for us, call out the balls---with many side comments-----and I won!! TWICE! Each bingo round was based on some type of sexual connotation---many of which were unknown by me :) But I caught on fast.
We played for about 2 hours. Half way through, our hostess needed to make a costume change. Then she proceeded to sing a song while mincing around the bar, ending up on top of the bar right in front of us. Damn, she had good legs!!!
Well, we stumbled out of the bar after a night of debauchery and lots of laughter. I won a $20.00 Pizza Hut card and a t-shirt. And we raised about $700.00 for the death row dogs!! All in all---a win-win evening.
After sharing my evening fun with Wayne, he told me the police chase was on the news and then he forbade me to hang out with Lorrie without prior vetting!!! (Actually, if we ever go again---we plan to bring our husbands!)
So, I know you want to know about the police chase......but that's a whole other story!!! And not as titalating as ours!
5/7/11
It's Official! I Am Now Dangerous!!!
Yep, today I moved into a whole new dimension in my life!! I manuevered a BOBCAT!
This old broken down granny has found her new career!!! When I retire from being a teacher-librarian--I'm going to be driving the big earth movin machines for some construction company!!!
It's in my blood now! Today it was scooping up gravel in the loader, moving it around the community garden, and then dumping the ole bucket. If only I could have gone faster!!! (Where's ole Tim the Toolman when you need him??)
From here, no machine is too big. The bigger the better I say! (or am I confusing machines with ........... :)
Anyway, I have found my inspiration. Now all I need do is convince some construction company to hire me. I figure I'll get me one or two of those low-rise pair of pants, hang a cute, low-riding toolbelt over these ample hips and wha-lah!! I'm in!! Them tools will be a swinging in a way that those men have never seen. Mesmerizing......simply mesmerizing!!!!
You may now refer to me as,
Bobcat Suzi!!
This old broken down granny has found her new career!!! When I retire from being a teacher-librarian--I'm going to be driving the big earth movin machines for some construction company!!!
It's in my blood now! Today it was scooping up gravel in the loader, moving it around the community garden, and then dumping the ole bucket. If only I could have gone faster!!! (Where's ole Tim the Toolman when you need him??)
From here, no machine is too big. The bigger the better I say! (or am I confusing machines with ........... :)
Anyway, I have found my inspiration. Now all I need do is convince some construction company to hire me. I figure I'll get me one or two of those low-rise pair of pants, hang a cute, low-riding toolbelt over these ample hips and wha-lah!! I'm in!! Them tools will be a swinging in a way that those men have never seen. Mesmerizing......simply mesmerizing!!!!
You may now refer to me as,
Bobcat Suzi!!
4/24/11
Mystery Invite!
This arrived in the mail on Friday:
No return address, no name, no date, no location!!
So I'm racking my brain trying to remember if some event was going on at school, at church, etc. I'm notorious for forgetting events---even after putting them on my calendar.
I looked over the writing--kinda looked like my library aide's. But she would have given the details.
Showed it to Wayne--he was clueless.
Later that evening, my neighbors came over for a glass of wine and a visit on the porch. I showed the invite to them. I wondered if it was hand drawn--hard to tell as it was in black ink and so well done it was impossible to tell if it was printed or drawn. We also noted that PICNIC was misspelled PINIC.
None of us could figure it out. So it was forgotten---wine can have that effect......
Easter Morn arrived along with our granddaughter, Hayley, waking us at 6:45 all excited because the Easter bunny had brought her a basket full of goodies. So we started hunting for hidden eggs. The weather had been very wet lately, so the ole Easter bunny just hid the eggs in the house.
Imagine my surprise when I opened the living room blinds and saw this:
So I'm racking my brain trying to remember if some event was going on at school, at church, etc. I'm notorious for forgetting events---even after putting them on my calendar.
I looked over the writing--kinda looked like my library aide's. But she would have given the details.
Showed it to Wayne--he was clueless.
Later that evening, my neighbors came over for a glass of wine and a visit on the porch. I showed the invite to them. I wondered if it was hand drawn--hard to tell as it was in black ink and so well done it was impossible to tell if it was printed or drawn. We also noted that PICNIC was misspelled PINIC.
None of us could figure it out. So it was forgotten---wine can have that effect......
Easter Morn arrived along with our granddaughter, Hayley, waking us at 6:45 all excited because the Easter bunny had brought her a basket full of goodies. So we started hunting for hidden eggs. The weather had been very wet lately, so the ole Easter bunny just hid the eggs in the house.
Imagine my surprise when I opened the living room blinds and saw this:
Some of you might not be aware that I have a neighbor extraordinaire who loves to create displays (in my yard!) on any given holiday. She has delighted us with many creations (although the dandelions were rather embarassing!)
This Easter creation included gnomes hidden all over my yard (better than all the beer bottles I usually find hidden in my hostas!) along with a great looking picnic!
What's really sad is that I DIDN'T make the connection between the mystery invitation and this Easter display!! (it was all the wine-----and I'm sticking to that excuse) Only when Laura came out of her house did I make the connection. SHE KNEW ALL ALONG ABOUT THE MYSTERY INVITE---she and the other neighbors were laughing hysterically behind my back as I was trying to figure out who had sent the darn invitation.
So I tip my wine glass to Laura for her creativity and devious nature!!!
I'm lovin it!!!
P.S. If you look real carefully, you'll see a tiny gnome hidden in the invitation---sneaky!
I'm lovin it!!!
P.S. If you look real carefully, you'll see a tiny gnome hidden in the invitation---sneaky!
2/1/11
Snow Madness
Yes, it is snowing - AGAIN!! We've already had 5 snow days, now we're in for 2 or 3 more! We've lost Easter Monday and added 3 days on to the end of the year. The next loss is part of our spring break. I think this is a plan by the school district to introduce us to year-around schooling.
The earlier snow days at least allowed me to get out of the house by the afternoon. One day I went for a massage, did a little shopping, just had a leisurely enjoyable day. I plan to enjoy every snow day to the max---as I'll be making up for them in June!!
This snow is different though. More like memorable snow days I have spent in Wisconsin. Not going to get out of the house for a couple of days. Therefore I must keep myself from succumbing to cabin fever!! I no longer have cross country skiis, ice skates, or snow shoes---so it is indoor activities for me.
I do have facebook now to keep me connected to the world. And I had to laugh out loud at one person's thread that talked about picking out the weakest link in your family in case you ran out of food. With only Wayne and myself here, there would be only limited options. (If only Hayley were still here :) Unfortunately, I'm thinkin that I'm the weak link and if Wayne were desperate enough---he could stay fed for at least a month if snowed in.
Now my neighbor thought these kind of thoughts were quite ghoulish!! Of course she isn't from the great white north and doesn't understand that people up north have 5 or 6 kids for the express purposes of having a food supply if things become desperate in the great snowy darkness of the northern climes.
Perhaps that is why she declined my invitation to sup with us on a delectable meal of chicken tortilla soup and corn bread this evening. I wonder if she was a little worried about being added to my stock pot?????
So what shall I do to occupy myself for the next couple of days? I can share the pleasure of my thoughts with the great world wide web via this blog and facebook, I have a prayer shawl to finish crocheting, and I've got lots of books and journals at my disposal. I have baking supplies and as long as I have electricity I can make cookies and cakes and pies. I have the TV and NetfFlicks and lots of exercise videos and DVDs (which I'll need if I do all that baking). And best of all -- my husband is stuck here with me--- so.......I believe we could find some inventive ways to kill time :) Let's just leave it at that!
So what's happening in your little corner of the world????
The earlier snow days at least allowed me to get out of the house by the afternoon. One day I went for a massage, did a little shopping, just had a leisurely enjoyable day. I plan to enjoy every snow day to the max---as I'll be making up for them in June!!
This snow is different though. More like memorable snow days I have spent in Wisconsin. Not going to get out of the house for a couple of days. Therefore I must keep myself from succumbing to cabin fever!! I no longer have cross country skiis, ice skates, or snow shoes---so it is indoor activities for me.
I do have facebook now to keep me connected to the world. And I had to laugh out loud at one person's thread that talked about picking out the weakest link in your family in case you ran out of food. With only Wayne and myself here, there would be only limited options. (If only Hayley were still here :) Unfortunately, I'm thinkin that I'm the weak link and if Wayne were desperate enough---he could stay fed for at least a month if snowed in.
Now my neighbor thought these kind of thoughts were quite ghoulish!! Of course she isn't from the great white north and doesn't understand that people up north have 5 or 6 kids for the express purposes of having a food supply if things become desperate in the great snowy darkness of the northern climes.
Perhaps that is why she declined my invitation to sup with us on a delectable meal of chicken tortilla soup and corn bread this evening. I wonder if she was a little worried about being added to my stock pot?????
So what shall I do to occupy myself for the next couple of days? I can share the pleasure of my thoughts with the great world wide web via this blog and facebook, I have a prayer shawl to finish crocheting, and I've got lots of books and journals at my disposal. I have baking supplies and as long as I have electricity I can make cookies and cakes and pies. I have the TV and NetfFlicks and lots of exercise videos and DVDs (which I'll need if I do all that baking). And best of all -- my husband is stuck here with me--- so.......I believe we could find some inventive ways to kill time :) Let's just leave it at that!
So what's happening in your little corner of the world????
12/27/10
Life as a Pretzel
Ok, I was doing fine, being good, not pigging out with Chritmas goodies--UNTIL--Brittany, my son's girlfriend brought over her mother's home-made peanut brittle! It was melt in your mouth YUMMY!!! Nothing like the rock hard stuff I've made in the past. This woman knows how to make BRITTLE!!!
Did she send over just a bite or two??? NOOOOOOOO! A whole container!! Which Wayne and I finished off in two days!!! So, it's the Monday after Christmas and time to work it all off at the gym.
I noted there was a Yoga class at the Y and it fit right in with my schedule. I love yoga---but haven't done it for about a year. They just don't offer it at convenient times when I'm working. But now that I have week off........well, no excuses.
You don't know how stiff and tight you are until you start doing some of those pretzel moves!!! Like sitting down and trying to cross your legs indian style!! Ya, you might think that is an easy move---just sit down and try it all you over 50 year-old types!!
You know it's going to be interesting when you can't even do the simple poses! When the yoga master asks you to do an upward dog pose and take those thighs off the floor and just rest on your toes and arms---it's simply laughable. Raise my thunder thighs to where?????
This is how it's supposed to look. Thank God they don't allow cameras in the yoga room. And the no lights thing is the only reason I attempt any of it. Darkness is supposed to be relaxing and allows one to focus. I just use it to hide and hope that no one knows what all the grunting is about over in my corner!
What I love most about Yoga, is you can go at your own pace and level. When everyone else jumps their legs to the front of the mat from a prone position---I can simply grab one leg and push it forward and then pull the lagging back leg up next to it.
I'm just happy I'm still moving!!
I do feel better cause the young guy next to me was blowing like a beached whale!!! And I could hold some positions longer than he could!!! Unfolding from those positions took me longer but hell I had 20 years on the guy!!
Needless to say, when I got home I took two Ibuprofen tablets just to ensure that I could move around for the rest of the day!
Did she send over just a bite or two??? NOOOOOOOO! A whole container!! Which Wayne and I finished off in two days!!! So, it's the Monday after Christmas and time to work it all off at the gym.
I noted there was a Yoga class at the Y and it fit right in with my schedule. I love yoga---but haven't done it for about a year. They just don't offer it at convenient times when I'm working. But now that I have week off........well, no excuses.
You don't know how stiff and tight you are until you start doing some of those pretzel moves!!! Like sitting down and trying to cross your legs indian style!! Ya, you might think that is an easy move---just sit down and try it all you over 50 year-old types!!
You know it's going to be interesting when you can't even do the simple poses! When the yoga master asks you to do an upward dog pose and take those thighs off the floor and just rest on your toes and arms---it's simply laughable. Raise my thunder thighs to where?????
This is how it's supposed to look. Thank God they don't allow cameras in the yoga room. And the no lights thing is the only reason I attempt any of it. Darkness is supposed to be relaxing and allows one to focus. I just use it to hide and hope that no one knows what all the grunting is about over in my corner!
What I love most about Yoga, is you can go at your own pace and level. When everyone else jumps their legs to the front of the mat from a prone position---I can simply grab one leg and push it forward and then pull the lagging back leg up next to it.
I'm just happy I'm still moving!!
I do feel better cause the young guy next to me was blowing like a beached whale!!! And I could hold some positions longer than he could!!! Unfolding from those positions took me longer but hell I had 20 years on the guy!!
Needless to say, when I got home I took two Ibuprofen tablets just to ensure that I could move around for the rest of the day!
Some day, if I keep up the yoga, I'll be able to do this:
And when I scream for help, please be kind and unwind me!
12/16/10
Spotted Dick, Anyone?
It all started with a missing link.....
I attended the Library Christmas Party the other day--lots of food and good conversation with my peers, whom I rarely get to see. Glory, our new High School librarian, and I were recalling our pathetic library courses that we attended together. Between crazy teachers and fellow students who drove us and the teacher crazy--we managed to get our degrees. Glory reminded me of a fellow cohort that we both had in common and that she had a blog--so we could keep up on what was happening in her life. Glory promised to send me the link.......
The next day, (I had already forgotten about the blog--very short term memory these days) Glory sent me a message with the link for Shea's blog. Of course she had forgotten to imbed the link. So I messaged back that the link was missing. Here was her reply---in her own words:
"Perhaps I should actually PASTE it. I’m not always this scattered, although I’m going to tell you a little story that might lead you to think otherwise:
Last night after the party, I was at Price Chopper when a friend from my high school days called. I circled the store aimlessly chatting with her for the next 40 minutes. As I was putting away my groceries, I was stunned to discover I had purchase a $5.53 can of spotted dick! What does one do with spotted dick, I pondered on Facebook. Believe me, I received lots of hilarious suggestions! I even posted a photo, captioned—As I paid dearly for the spotted dick, I placed it on our mantle. (You have to know I am thrifty—instead of Heinz 57, I bought the Best Choice knock-off—59 sauce—so I could save two dollars!)
Have a great day!"
Priceless!!! I immediately posted back that I was going to friend her on Facebook just so I could see reply's to her posting!!!
Totally forgot about the whole event until I was in bed with my lover. (That would be Wayne, my husband, for those of you who were wondering.) Then the cackling and snickering just took over.
When I asked Wayne if he wanted some Spotted Dick--well, then the hysteria began. I couldn't stop laughing, and all these little scenerios kept running through my head. Needless to say, neither of us got to sleep very early. But I do have some great lines should I run in to any of my close friends :)
I attended the Library Christmas Party the other day--lots of food and good conversation with my peers, whom I rarely get to see. Glory, our new High School librarian, and I were recalling our pathetic library courses that we attended together. Between crazy teachers and fellow students who drove us and the teacher crazy--we managed to get our degrees. Glory reminded me of a fellow cohort that we both had in common and that she had a blog--so we could keep up on what was happening in her life. Glory promised to send me the link.......
The next day, (I had already forgotten about the blog--very short term memory these days) Glory sent me a message with the link for Shea's blog. Of course she had forgotten to imbed the link. So I messaged back that the link was missing. Here was her reply---in her own words:
"Perhaps I should actually PASTE it. I’m not always this scattered, although I’m going to tell you a little story that might lead you to think otherwise:
Last night after the party, I was at Price Chopper when a friend from my high school days called. I circled the store aimlessly chatting with her for the next 40 minutes. As I was putting away my groceries, I was stunned to discover I had purchase a $5.53 can of spotted dick! What does one do with spotted dick, I pondered on Facebook. Believe me, I received lots of hilarious suggestions! I even posted a photo, captioned—As I paid dearly for the spotted dick, I placed it on our mantle. (You have to know I am thrifty—instead of Heinz 57, I bought the Best Choice knock-off—59 sauce—so I could save two dollars!)
Have a great day!"
Priceless!!! I immediately posted back that I was going to friend her on Facebook just so I could see reply's to her posting!!!
Totally forgot about the whole event until I was in bed with my lover. (That would be Wayne, my husband, for those of you who were wondering.) Then the cackling and snickering just took over.
When I asked Wayne if he wanted some Spotted Dick--well, then the hysteria began. I couldn't stop laughing, and all these little scenerios kept running through my head. Needless to say, neither of us got to sleep very early. But I do have some great lines should I run in to any of my close friends :)
10/24/10
Missing My Man
I've been wanting to do something with my front yard for a lonnnnnngggggggg time. I want to create a Japenese type rock and sand garden around the big oak and the crappy little garden that surrounds the mailbox. Nothing wants to grow in the soil around the mailbox, and the front grass area around the tree is sparse---so I say it's time to kill the grass and put in some rock, sand, and maybe a little cement bridge.
All peaceful and serene looking. That's what is in my head---just don't know how to put it into reality.
So I've been perusing Japenese Rock Garden pictures on the web. I get all excited about the possibilities, but I know there will be a lot of hauling of rock etc. That's where Wayne comes in---but for some reason he is not to be found when I'm in the throes of my rock garden passion!! (Generally, he's not to be found any time I get out the honey-do list!) If he would only love what I love, our yard would look MAGNIFICENT!
So here are a couple of pics that inspire me with ideas:
So tell me what you think......And remember, my plan will be very simple--nothing as elaborate as some of these pictures.
P.S. I still can't find Wayne---where is that MAN!!!!
All peaceful and serene looking. That's what is in my head---just don't know how to put it into reality.
So I've been perusing Japenese Rock Garden pictures on the web. I get all excited about the possibilities, but I know there will be a lot of hauling of rock etc. That's where Wayne comes in---but for some reason he is not to be found when I'm in the throes of my rock garden passion!! (Generally, he's not to be found any time I get out the honey-do list!) If he would only love what I love, our yard would look MAGNIFICENT!
So here are a couple of pics that inspire me with ideas:
So tell me what you think......And remember, my plan will be very simple--nothing as elaborate as some of these pictures.
P.S. I still can't find Wayne---where is that MAN!!!!
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